Beer Balls

Show Us Your Balls, Episode 2 Script

 

Episode 1 script for reference (opens in new window).

 

Characters:

• Vic Volley (tennis instructor)
• Love Lapointe (tennis student)
• Carlo Topspin (middle dude)
• Mitch Match (dude #1)
• Ball Murray (dude #2)

 

 

Scene 1

Setting:

 

In a garage the three handsome men (still in tennis outfits) are tinkering with the ball shooter. Various tools are used in order to reformat the ball shooter to accept beer cans.

 

Mitch, wearing a welding mask begins working on the ball shooter while sparks fly upwards. Ball Murray and Carlo holding a blueprint

 

cut to Ball Murray underneath the shooter wrenching while the other two battle with a crowbar in the insertion canal, an overhead light is swinging from an unknown mishap.

 

cut to the test run where Mitch drops in a beer can and nothing happens other than liquid gushing out the bottom.

 

cut to more insane tool tinkering with all three handome men.

 

cut to seond test run. The three men are outside in a parking lot wheeling the machine. Carlo drops in a beer can as Mitch goes long. Once he reaches set distance he holds out his hands as to receive the beer can. The machine is turned on and the beer can flies out fiercely and into Mitch's hand.

 

Ball Murray rejoices.

 

SCENE 2

 

The three men arrive at the tennis court. Mitch walks into frame, stands and stretches. Ball walks into frame and begins warming up as well (both without raquets) Carlo wheels the ball shooter into frame and Mitch and Ball give each other a high five and run to the other side of the court.

 

cut to a close up of Mitch's watering mouth and anxious, twitchy eyes.

 

cut to Ball rubbing his tongue against his lips in anticipation

 

cut to Mitch's jittery feet as he prepares for the shooter to begin.

 

Carlo initiates the machine and a loud, sharp metallic noise is heard as a beer can flies out of the machine.

 

Mitch with immense skill and precision, grabs the beer can in the fashion of a professional forehand stroke. As he catches it, you hear the boisterious and somewhat perverted tennis grunt.

 

(song begins-instrumental)

 

Another beer can projects and Ball catches it in the way someone would serve a ball.

 

several quick cuts of the cans shooting and Mitch and Ball leaping to catch the cans and grunting with dramatic and boisterous tennis grunts and whimpers, catching the cans using tennis strokes to improve their game.

 

(song ends)

 

SCENE 3

 

The three men are on the court when Carlo eagerly dumps an entire 12 pack of beer into the machine to test their skill level.

 

slow motion shots of each person sporting a terrified and surprised visage.

 

(song begins)

 

Close shot of the shooter as a quick flash of liquid spouts from the ball shooter.

 

Close shot of the two men stand motionless, silent, drenched and sopping wet in fizzing liquid.

 

Wide shot of the two men, still dripping.

 

A beer can rolls across the ground into view, gushing from the spout.

 

CUT TO BLACK

 

Graphic of a single tennis ball bearing the CANADIAN FLAG

 

(VO)

 

"Canada...Big Ideas...Handsome Men...with a lot of balls.